A Friday night with NFL running back Clinton Portis:

It’s not as if he saw angels and decided to become one, no sham barf like that. “People don’t like perfect,” he says. “You gotta show that you can still stir shit up, get some negative pub.” But he did finally see the possibilities of his life, how full he could make it, as though he alone could know what it really meant to be, in his words, “a young man living.”

A fish tank in every room, for starters. His obsession with them also began in college, during his sophomore year, when his roommate bought one and suddenly their cinder-block cell felt like a pad. The most elaborate of his current collection has been reserved for his bedroom, where the magic happens. More specifically, it’s reserved for his bed, the headboard of which consists of an aquarium that nearly reaches the ceiling, a square-shouldered arch filled with salt water, coral, fish, and a freakishly large sea anemone that looks an awful lot like a gaping vagina.